The Last Time
by takuyaoi
Summary: Aomine and Kagami have to face the harsh reality and both of them can't fight against it. And so they spent their last time together...


Characters/Pairing: Aomine Daiki, Kagami Taiga/AoKaga

Genre: Romance, Drama, Angst, Yaoi

Fandom: Kuroko no Basket

Prompt: Goodbye to You by Michelle Branch, Goodbye by Secondhand Serenade

Disclaimer: This work has Yaoi/BL adult content. And may break your hearts into pieces. Proceed with caution. Don't like yaoi, don't read. Don't like angst, don't read. In short: **READ AT YOUR OWN RISK.**

* * *

 _Of all the things I've believed in,_

 _I just want to get it over with.._

 _Tears form behind my eyes_

 _But I do not cry,_

 _Counting the days that pass me by_ …

* * *

I sat across the redhead guy without saying anything. I stared at him, and he stares back. Both of us sat in silence, our eyes on each other overflowing with emotions from unspoken words between us.

My eyes gazed upon wild hair, his unique eyebrows, his eyes, his nose, his lips, his face. Memorizing each detail, each freckle, deeply etching all of them in my memory.

We just sat there, unmoving. I feel his gaze on me; longing, wanting, _needing._

I can't hold back anymore.

I reached out to him, still not uttering a single word, my hand finally reaching his chin. I see my fingers visibly shaking. He heaved a gasp, shutting his eyes closed.

As he opened his eyes again, I only see despair, and I felt desperate myself. I closed the gap between us, and I enveloped him in my arms, holding on to him like my life depended on it…

* * *

 _It's a shame that it had to be this way_

 _It's not enough to say I'm sorry,_

 _It's not enough to say I'm sorry…_

* * *

My chest felt like burning as I felt his arms around me. And yet I also felt that sense of familiarity and comfort as I indulged myself in his warmth.

Warm liquid started flowing down my cheeks, and my vision blurred. I feel his arms tighten around me, and I cling on to this man who became very much like the other half of myself. I grabbed onto his shirt, wanting for this moment to never end, wanting for us to stay like this forever.

He started to pull away a bit and held my face to look him straight in the eyes.

Those dark blue eyes which now mirrors the despair in mine.

His soft fingers gently caressed my cheek, wiping away the tears that continuously flowed down. I leaned my face on it, holding his hand in mine.

I wrapped my arms around his neck, as my lips searched for his, and it was bliss.

I kissed him like it was my first time kissing him.

I kissed him hoping to make him feel how much I needed him.

I kissed him with my everything.

I kissed him like my life depended on it.

 _I kissed him like it will be our last kiss._

* * *

 _I've been searching deep down in my soul,_  
 _Words that I'm hearing are starting to get old,_  
 _It feels like I'm starting all over again…_

* * *

Once again, I felt his hopelessness as I succumbed to his kisses. I've never seen his tears before, and this is the first time that I did. I felt a stinging pain in my chest that shook my whole being as I realized how much pain I am putting him through. _How could I do this to such a wonderful man, who has done nothing but give his everything to me?_ My heart felt like it was being stabbed repeatedly as I felt his cheeks get more wet from tears, and I found myself shedding my own tears as well.

I embraced him, my hands roaming around his back as I started to pull up his shirt a bit, trying to commit to my memory how his body felt. How his skin felt against my skin.

As we both parted to gasp for air, I leaned my forehead against his. We we're both running out of breath, and I noticed his eyes were closed though tears are still flowing down from them.

 _"I'm sorry."_ Those were the first words I uttered to him tonight, and might be the only words I have for him. I heard my voice cracked.

Two words, and yet the heaviness was undeniable as it loomed over us.

His shoulders started to shake visibly, and again I feel helpless and worthless. I wanted to take all the pain away from him, but how should I do that when _I_ am the cause of the pain he's going through?

 _"I'm sorry.. Kagami.."_

I kissed his forehead, his eyes, his nose, his cheeks.

 _"I'm so sorry, Taiga.."_

I landed my lips on his neck, my tongue darting to his sensitive spot that I know so much, hoping this will make him forget the pain he's feeling, even for just a moment.

 _I love you, Taiga,_ my mind screamed, but I know I have no right to say these words anymore. I know full well that uttering these words will just hurt him more.

"I love you, Daiki.." I heard his voice whisper those words like a prayer, and my heart felt like it was twisted and squeezed. I'm hurting him, and yet he only has words of love to tell me. He should be hating me, but here he is telling me he loves me.

 _"I'm so sorry, Taiga…"_ I said again, as I reached up to his face again after I've finally removed his shirt completely.

* * *

 _Maybe I'm to blame,_

 _Or maybe we're the same.._

 _But either way I can't breathe,_

 _Either way I can't breathe…_

* * *

As I felt his lips lock on mine again, our kisses grew more frantic, hands roaming and touching every part of our bodies. We separated temporarily as I quickly removed his shirt, and our lips are back on each other again in a split second. It felt like both us don't want to waste even just a split second.

"I'm so sorry, Taiga, I'm so sorry," his deep yet broken voice kept repeating every time our lips would part for air.

A few seconds after, our clothes all discarded, we were both lying on the bed, and his lips started kissing my face again. My eyes never left his face as I let my hands roam over his back. His dark skin felt smooth against my fingers, and I memorized each ripple of muscle lining his spine, before I let my hands travel to his nape. I felt the tips of his dark blue hair, and tugged on it as I felt his tongue and lips landing wet kisses on the sensitive spot on my neck.

"Daiki…" I whispered…

My hips bucked as his hand suddenly gripped my hardness, and I gasped as his lips landed on one of my nipples, sending shivers and goosebumps all over my body. I closed my eyes as I started to drown with all the sensation he's making me feel all at once. His sucked and kissed all over my chest, my shoulders, as his hand started to stroke me, gently at first, until he started to move urgently. I tugged his hair harder, my pants in rhythm with the urgency of his strokes.

"Come, Taiga.."

At his raspy command, I came undone for the first time tonight.

* * *

 _I still get lost in your eyes,_

 _And it seems that I can't live a day without you…_

 _Closing my eyes and you chase my thoughts away,_

 _To a place where I am blinded by the light,_

 _But it's not right.._

* * *

I felt him shudder once, twice, thrice. His love juice spilled over my hand grasping his shaft to his stomach. I massaged him a bit more, before I started to spread the spill to his hole, preparing him.

I kissed him fully on the mouth again, and I feel him gasp as I entered one digit. He clenched tightly around it, and I felt my own shaft harden even more. My tongue searched his, and I can see beneath his hooded eyes how he much he wants me as he kissed me with fervent passion.

 _I want him to forget the pain I'm causing and will be causing him, even just for tonight. For the last time._

My finger searched for his spot, and as I found it I felt him shudder and whimper through my mouth. His hand left my hair, and in a split second, I felt it gripping me. I grunted and closed my eyes as we continued to frantically kiss each other.

Our bodies were grinding each other, tangle of limbs and all, and I added another digit to spread him even more.

"Ugh… Daiki…" he groaned and bit my shoulder.

I love his reactions, his groans and his moans. Another stabbing pain hit me as I realized this may be the last time I will be hearing them.

"D-daiki…?" he panted, his voice questioning softly, as I noticed I actually stopped with my actions.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry…" I felt another set of tears flow and my vision blurred, and I kissed him tenderly. I started moving again.

"I'm okay. _I'll be okay,_ " he smiled painfully, "I love you…"

I inserted a third finger, and he came undone a second time. I kissed his face as I watched him spiraling down, etching it deep in my memory.

* * *

 _I'm alive but I'm losing all my drive,_

 _Cause everything we've been through,_

 _And everything about you_

 _Seemed to be a lie,_

 _A guiltless twisted lie_

 _It made me learn to hate you_

 _Or hate myself for letting it pass by…_

* * *

I closed my eyes as I shivered, reaching my high for the second time, and I see a series of flashbacks of how it all started between us. Everything.

He wasn't my first, and likewise I wasn't to him as well. But we both felt comfort like no other in each other's company, even if we were both guys.

 _"I was lonely for a long time, Kagami. And then you came, wreaked havoc and turned everything upside down,"_ he would often tell me smugly with that playful smirk plastered on his face.

He was a prideful guy, so even if this sounds conceited, I know he was only downplaying everything whenever he tells me those words. But I know it meant a lot more than what he put into words.

"I love you, Daiki…"

I felt him push inside me. I whimpered at the sudden feeling of fullness. He started to move but I held him close, "Wait…" I begged.

He probably sensed the desperation in my voice, and I felt him nod on my shoulder as he planted kisses on it.

I was afraid of the emptiness this night will leave me with, and if anything I wanted to feel him inside me for as long as I could. I want to remember how it felt having him inside me.

"Are you okay?" he whispered. I nodded, "You can move now."

And so he did.

With every thrust he makes, a tear would flow down my cheeks, but I feel his lips gently kissing them away.

We were both desperate, _but we don't have any other choice._

* * *

 _And it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time,_

 _I want what's yours and I want what's mine.._

 _I want you,_

 _But I'm not giving in this time…_

* * *

I kept moving in and out of him, and with each thrust, I hear him sob.

I wanted to make him forget everything else, even for just a couple of hours, but I guess I failed.

I wanted to make him forget the pain, but I guess it was too conceited of me to think that way.

Too insensitive.

He gave me his everything, and yet here I am about to leave him with nothing.

I don't care if I'm hurting. If it's just me, I could live with that. But I can't bear to cause this man the same pain I'm feeling.

"I'm sorry, Taiga…"

How many times have I said these words to him? I lost count already.

I kept saying these words. I don't want him to forgive me, but there are no other words I can tell him.

 _I love you.. I love you.. I love you.. I'm sorry.._ I chanted inside my head each time I thrusted inside him. He clenches each time, and I feel like he can hear my thoughts through them and is responding to them.

I gripped his shaft again, stroking him gently in contrast with my frantic thrusts. He bit my shoulder as soon as my fingers came in contact with his length, and I let him.

He wrapped his legs around my waist, and I was able to thrust in deeper as I stroke him and watched his face. His eyes were shut so tight as he panted, tears still flowing down.

I pulled out, adjusted my hip a bit, and thrusted with a goal in mind: hitting his spot. He clenched so tight as I felt him shudder again. With that, I came undone with him, grunting as I kissed him fully and fervently, as if he is my source of breath.

Because he is. He breathed life back into me. I was dead but he brought me back to life. That should be enough for me to fight for him.

But I didn't.

I couldn't.

 **I didn't.**

* * *

 _All I had to say is goodbye._

 _We're better off this way…_

 _And every, everything isn't only what it seemed_

 _So hold these words that you never told me…_

 _It's time to say goodbye._

* * *

He collapsed on top of me, panting, gasping for breath, and it was my turn to watch and kiss his face. After a few moments, he rolled off of me and cuddled me in his arms. He kissed my hair every so often, until I heard his light snores and I know he's succumbed to sleep.

We were happy, but reality slapped us so hard that we had no choice but to surrender to it.

He wanted to fight it. I didn't want him to.

Because then I didn't know if we can still preserve the happiness between us. Or even just his happiness.

Either way, our relationship was already set to be damned from the beginning. We were just temporarily wrapped in our tiny little bubble. Until reality popped it.

I know he's beating himself up for being a coward. But he can't see it's me who's the bigger coward between us. I am a coward, afraid to be the cause of his unhappiness.

Society is cruel. This society is cruel. We are forced bend to what society has deemed as right and wrong.

I watched his sleeping face for the longest time, memorizing each detail. Burning it into my mind, tattooing it. I watched him breathe, his chest heaving with each breath he takes.

I glanced at the desk clock. _It's about time._

I gently pulled away from him and got up, careful not to wake him up. I dressed up, and as soon as I'm done, I planted one last gentle kiss on his cheek before whispering, "I love you, Daiki," for the last time.

I see him smile, as if he was dreaming something really pleasant, and it relieves me a bit.

I wrote a short note, and then I left.

I left, leaving half of myself with him, in that room.

* * *

 _Goodbye to you,_

 _Goodbye to everything I thought I knew…_

 _You were the one I loved,_

 _The one thing that I tried to hold on to…_

* * *

I felt warmth on my face, and as I opened my eyes and squinted, I realized it was the sun seeping through my window blinds.

My hand automatically searched for the familiar body on my bed, but found none.

 _Taiga!_

My eyes shot fully open as I shot up from the bed at the same time.

 _No…_

"Kagami!" I called out.

Silence.

A tear fell down.

"Taiga!" I stood up, searching, though I fully know no one's going to answer.

I won't hear that familiar warm voice anymore.

"No…"

My eyes landed on a piece of paper on the desk beside my bed, and I felt my fingers shake.

I reached out to it and read the familiar handwriting.

 _Please be happy with her. I only wish for both your happiness._

My vision blurred.

I broke down.

I haven't been able to tell him those words for the last time.

 _"I love you, Taiga…."_

* * *

 _Take my pain away_

 _Tear it out_

 _Tell me I was wrong,_

 _Tell me I was wrong..._

* * *

 _And when the stars fall, I will lie awake,_

 _You're my shooting star..._


End file.
